"Honey, we need to live separately!", Or whether the necessary pause in relations?
We are all adults and are well aware what a titanic work under an hour - to be in a relationship. Especially after the passed period of acute love, and "rose-colored glasses" had to change the usual, with diopters. So, it's done, that is the word "relationship," it said, and now they need to somehow build, to accept each other without the exaltation of the early days and choose a model of behavior in your relationship.
That is, you have to choose whether monogamy is the foundation of your relationship, and that is not uncommon in our time, you will be "practicing" open relationship in which one no one seems to be nothing, and should not, but in case of leaving the partner "left" for some reason it hurts so, as if the treaty on freedom did not exist.
And today we'll talk about whether to part with a favorite for a while, if necessary pause and timeouts you need in a relationship, and even speculate if it will be together again after such a temporary separation. By the way, according to statistics, only 30% of couples are sure that after such breaks relations will not be restored, but the prevailing 70 per cent believe in the beneficial effects of a "pause" in the relationship.
As seen from a distance?
Those who advocate a pause in the relationship, claiming that the distance make it possible to understand what you lose when a close person is not close to you. What used to seem natural for granted - mundane, seemingly caring, morning coffee together, arguing about which movie to see, warmth and a sense of intimacy - all at a distance could get the value that the pause will be reduced to a minimum, and a pair of the mutual desire again to be solved together. And, yes, in this case we are talking about partners, who have already lived together.
But if you are in the very beginning of the relationship, and your partner offers you to take a break, this is likely to mean a break, and he was not going to think about your distance relationship, he simply does not want to continue on. And it would not hurt your feelings, it is necessary to agree on the proposal and leave, if possible, not pestering him with questions then, "Well, you've thought?" And messages about how you without bad. Who knows, maybe he realized what a treasure he had lost, your partner will do everything possible to bring you back.
What problems does not help solve the pause?
Pause in relationships and life at a distance from each other clearly does not help you understand the problems the solution of which requires clarity in the "muddy" moments when you need to agree on something, or explain to the partner, which is not enough for you to relations. That is, a problem that can be solved, say, a "verbal", the distance will not be resolved. "The remoteness in space" can help to see itself, to formulate its problem soberly to rethink what is happening may introduce ways of solution, but will have to solve together, and for this purpose it is desirable to be near each other.
In any case, the pause is a must?
If you are together is not the first, and perhaps not even the tenth year, the big break in the relationship may be you just need. Thus, the temporary separation are shown in the following cases: a) if one of the partners, it seems that it disappeared into this relationship, almost losing himself, that is, it no longer distinguishes between where it wishes, and where the desires of his halves; b) when all the, like, happy, but the feeling of boredom and gravity becomes unbearable; c) if one of the two or both feel captive relationship and tear of freedom; d) if the sex is gone out of your home and forgot the way back; d) if each of your morning begins with a quarrel, and ends with a scandal. But if you know that you are all well, but some "pinches" something is missing, it is better that "spice" to look together, without parting (just take our word for it).
What are the distances?
If you decide to arrange a "vacation" from each other, it is important to immediately determine their duration. Will they last a couple of weeks or months, you will need? It all depends on the characteristics of relations and forces of attraction in the pair. Someone already bored over the weekend and running run back, and someone suddenly finds that year - it is so small. But be that as it may, too long a pause is rarely beneficial. And yet, it is very important to negotiate, whether you are during those "holidays" to meet with someone else, and it would be good to make it clear that each of you understands by this vague term "dating" - a meeting with a friend in a cafe or sex with ex boyfriend.
What gives pause in the relationship?
A pause in the relationship makes it possible to look from side to yourself and your partner, see if you want to stay in this relationship, what is for you their value, to see the ways of resolving the problems and contradictions that are not visible until you close, to revive romance and give new shades of the sexual aspect of the relationship, in the end, just make a break and gather strength for another one hundred happy years together.